Singles’ Day, 3 Line Love Letters, Sun Yang

Shantou University Female Student Proposed to Male Student on Singles’ Day! — Today [last Monday, November 11th] at “STU 2nd Cafeteria”, a fourth-year female student in a wedding dress holding a bouquet got down on one knee and proposed to a guy. After hugs and kisses, the guy carried the girl away. It is said that in order to pursue the girl, this guy had repeated a year of studies to enter Shantou University. Best wishes to them!

@叫兽易小星： If only housing prices were 50% off on “Double 11″…
@所长别开枪是我: Could you afford them even if they were 50% off?
@使徒子: Life is already so hard, so just leave some things be…

#Wuhan University Three-Line Love Letter# The crab is deshelling me, and the notebook is writing on me. A sky full of me falls upon maple leaves and snowflakes. And you are thinking of me.

[Note: This is the winner of a three-line love letter contest at Wuhan University.]

Now This Is “Don’t Get It But It’s Awesome“ — In the late-70s of the last century, Italian artist Serafini wrote a book. He created a magical surreal world in this 380-page book: The entire book was written in an unknown language. It’s so difficult to finish reading this book that this book became this gentleman’s most famous work. Come and experience it:

The meanest message I received on Singles’ Day, and I couldn’t help but sing it out aloud…

My father often teaches me: Don’t complain about the environment; try to change yourself. So after being single for one year at Hefei University of Technology, I became a jilao [gay person].

岳羽倩： Without you/[When I] feel cold/[I can] only buy a cup of hot drink. ——Three-line love letter
吴佐杭： With you/[When I] feel cold/[I will] have to buy two cups.

Sun Yang [Olympic champion swimmer] was determined to have been driving without a license after being involved in a traffic accident while driving his luxury car, for which he publicly apologized for on Weibo. At present, Sun Yang has been sentenced to 7 days of administrative detention. It is said that the scene of the rear-end collision was one of harmony/peace, that the other driver had even asked for Sun Yang’s autograph. However, because Sun Yang’s girlfriend who was a passenger in his car was dissatisfied with the amount of compensation that the other driver Feng promised, they voluntarily called the police…and so the police came [resulting in him being found to not have a license and being sentenced to 7 days detention].

Sun Yang is indeed a world champion. The 7-day detention was for no other purpose——this perfect way to avoid the Zhejiang University Fall Semester Exam Week surpasses us ordinary people by leagues [in its creativity/ingeniousness].

[Note: Sun Yang is a student at Zhejiang University.]

Upon learning that this ugly beggar in front of him is actually his biological father Duan Yanqing, Duan Yu was dumbstruck, only recovering his senses after a long time upon which he timidly asked: “Daddy, do you know how to sing ‘Twinkle Twinkle Little Star’?”

[Note: This joke reflects the popularity of the celebrity parenting reality show Where Are We Going, Dad? and Taiwanese celebrity Jimmy Lin, who played the above-mentioned Duan Yu in the 2003 TV series Demi-Gods and Semi-Devils “Babi [Daddy], do you know how to sing ‘Twinkle Twinkle Little Star'” is asked by Jimmy Lin’s son Kimi at the beginning of the popular show’s eponymous theme song.]

Before calling my dad, I thought a long time about whether to call him “daddy” or “babi“… The moment I opened my mouth, I ended up calling him dai bi [dumbass or dumb cunt].