2014’s Top 20 Quirky News Stories in China

From Sina Weibo:

@李铁根: 2014’s top 20 unethical news stories.

[Note: 没品 is difficult to translate here. Generally, it means unethical, lacking in moral character, and even “lacking in taste” or “tasteless”. However, at least a few of these stories do not necessarily have an “unethical” angle to them, and there were plenty of other news stories of “unethical” behavior. Same for “tasteless”. Therefore, the general sentiment here would be incidents considered strange/odd, embarrassing/shameful, or silly/quirky.]

1. Girl scares boyfriend by calling police and claiming he is an escaped criminal. Upon investigation, police discover he really is an escaped criminal.
2. Wenzhou old lady takes grandson to do paternity test only to discover father and son [her son and “grandson”] are actually brothers.
3. Thief picks pockets at Tiananmen Square, picks the pockets of two police officers in a row.
4. Harbin driver beats up woman crossing the street, claiming: It’d be one thing if you were pretty, but you’re ugly and you still block the street.
5. Man see’s back of girl, hatches plot to rape her, changes mind upon seeing her from the front, and is still arrested.
6. Man gets a hotel room with a woman he met online but thinks she’s too ugly, so he steals her iPhone 5S to cover the cost of the room.
7. Man who goes to hospital for a foot affliction ends up getting circumcised, feels cheated afterwards.
8. Zhejiang husband and wife couple fantasize about winning 5 million but end up coming to blows over an uneven split.
9. 5-year-old boy has three girlfriends at the same time, claims it is too stressful and wishes he could go back to being 4 years old.
10. Diner discovers condom in broiled fish plate, restaurant’s female manager immediately swallows it.
11. Man uses long-distance running and to lose over 5kg in weight just to be able to squeeze in through windows to steal things.
12. Because a Yunnan young man’s performance is poor, multi-level marketing organization forces him onto a train to get rid of him.
13. Hunan woman shouts in her sleep “get out of here, my husband’s back” sending her husband scurrying.
14. [Missing]
15. 4 university students lose control after losing online game, take train to another city to beat up teammate.
16. Hong Kong celebrity feng shui master buried alive by landslide while visiting Guangdong graveyard.
17. Dongguan man misses bus, chases it in a taxi over 7 stops to ask bus driver why he didn’t stop.
18. Chongqing elementary school student finds classmate’s bank card. After mother teaches him a lesson, she turns around and empties all the money from the card.
19. 2 Daqing women wearing mink fur who tell each other their clothes is worthless end up in fight where they rip out each others’ hair.
20. Gary Cao‘s daughter Grace reveals: daddy is on mommy’s body everyday. [Cary Chaw is one of the fathers on season two of Dad, Where Are We Going?

Comments from Sina Weibo:

魏世荣V：

14. Well-known microblog user’s math is poor, angers Virgo netizens and is ass-raped.

回忆专用小马甲：

Hahahaha, what a strange world.

傻傻小縣令：

Those like me who read it a second time to see if there was a #14 please raise your hands.

不减肥成功不改名的1025：

14. is the tragic death of a well-known microblog user who misappropriated news and angered Virgo netizens the twisting of humanity or the loss of morality? Find out on today’s Tie Gen Has Something to Say.

Dm_Park：

Haha…#14 is the best.

一线男星Alex：

We can see that every place has different levels of “bad” incidents, so in the future let’s not say “XX people are all cheats” or “XX people are all stupid cunts” and such things.